The Rings of Lordy: A Road too Far |

His first encounter with the tower came from a man, stuttering nonsense at the base of a large boulder at the shire,

“What’re think ya doin’ wit’ya lyin by thar!?”

“This is where I sleep.” I calmly proclaimed

“Sleep? Ain’t got non a that round ‘ere! You best be workin’ mate! An’ what ya’ think ya’ doin’ here anyway, sittin out in tha cold like it ain’t makin’ yer skin crawl ya little what’re think yer boulder does fer ya? Keep ya warm that boulder ain’t doon nutthhiin.”

“Well you see, I’m currently-”

“An’ what kinda home ya think that is anyway? Na man desrves dat piece a’ boulder doin wit he could have a whole house! ain’t gon do ya no good jus’ dat boulder!”

“It’s not just a boulder, it’s a rock.” I professed

“Well anyhoo; the town needs savin’ an we first think you bein all “different lookin'” n’ all that maybe you should sort it out.”

“What?”

“Well, ya see.”

It’s Evil

“I see.”

It was true, between all his lolligagging, Lordy had neglected the presence of an excitingly evil evil tower in his midst. He checked again to see it if was still there.

It was.

Lordy began procuring his belongings, most important of which, and that which he was doubly certainly absolutely sure not to forget, was his sword. Often, Lordy was surrounded by a wealth of alternative gear- so much so that he seldom remembered which of it was actually important.

“Now let’s see… Can’t take all this into the tower now. Gonna have to leave some behind.”

Red Leather Shield

“Nah- think I’ll one-hand this one.”

Hide Bracers

“Mm, definitely metal over hide.”

Steel Boots

“Nope, padded instead. Never know when one may sneak.”

White Fur Hood

“Isn’t Black the new White now?”

“Alright, what’s left?”

16 Beersteins

Bag of Granola